Uranium Fever
by thatwasnotmedicine
Summary: Have you ever wondered what was exactly in the intelligence briefcase? Maybe it really isn't gravel the mercenaries are fighting over. Maybe there's something much more profitable. Join the merc's as they try to find Engineer, stay out of jail, and attempt to not start a nuclear war!
1. Prologue

Hey guys! Thanks for stopping by and checking out my story. I'd appreciate any feedback you can give!

 ** _Prologue_**

 _23:32_

 _RED Base_

 _Teufort, NM_

Engineer sat at his desk in the workshop below the base. His hands were stacked on top of one another, with a pen still between his thumb and index finger. Below his arms was a blueprint for a new sentry model. Upgrades, scaling, and formulas were alongside the drawing of the sentry. The workshop was quiet, except for the occasional beep of the sentry in the corner. The night was quiet. For once, there was peace in Teufort.

"INTRUDER! INTRUDER! INTRUDER!"

Engineer jumped from his chair, the alarm startling him awake. He grabbed his wrench and turned to grab his tool box. He nearly missed the person now sitting in his chair.

"Ma'am? What are you doing here?" Engineer slowly approached the older woman.

"Mr. Conagher, I don't have a lot of time to explain, but I'm going to need you to come with me." The familiar voice ordered.

"What's this all about?" Engineer narrowed his eyes behind his goggles. "This ain't another Australium incident, is it?"

"Mr. Conagher, I do hold some degree of respect for you, but I need you to kindly shut up. We need to go. Right. Now." She stood up, her bones clicking with the movement.

"Ma'am, I can't abandon-"

"Now, Mr. Conagher." The Administrator ordered with an icy glare. Engineer swallowed hard and nodded once. He followed her lead from the garage door of the workshop and towards her car. He gave a short glance over his shoulder at the tall red base above him. He whispered a quick prayer asking for forgiveness, before shutting the car door.


	2. Chapter 1

Thanks so much for the positive feedback!

 _ **Chapter 1**_

01:47

RED Base

Teufort, NM

"Clear!" Soldier shouted over his shoulder. He was moving room to room, sweeping for any threats with Scout in tow.

"Dude, I already told you: There's no one in the base. Spy already cleared this floor." Scout grumbled. Scout had his arms crossed with his bat tucked under his arm.

"Never trust a Spy!" Soldier pointed a finger in Scout's face. "The only person one should trust, is themselves! Unless they are brainwashed by hippies!"

"Nothing you say, ever makes sense. I just want that stated for the record." Scout announced. He followed Soldier to the end of the hall, and then joined the rest of the team in the recreation room.

"Clear!" Soldier shouted. Medic and Spy shared a glance of confusion before returning their attention back to their comrades. Scout simply rolled his eyes.

"As I was saying," Spy spoke slowly, "there was no indication of an intruder. Everyone has been accounted for."

"Now wait a minute," Medic interrupted, "we are short one, ja? Where is the Engineer?"

The men looked among themselves, a few shrugged, while others shook their heads in dismissal.

"I haven't seen truckie all day. In fact, I don't think I've seen him since Friday, and today's…now Monday." Sniper responded. Scout and Demo groaned in disappointment. Pyro clapped his hands happily.

"You will stow that attitude men! You have a duty to your country to be out on that field at 0800!" Soldier decreed.

"We cannot fight without Engineer. He is valuable to team success." Heavy pointed out.

"Pfft, screw that guy. We all know I'm the greatest weapon this team has to offer." Scout responded arrogantly.

"Scout, in lough of never going through that ten-hour argument again, we're going to be moving on." Spy ordered, pinching the bridge of his nose. "It's late. I'm sure Engineer has gone out for a walk. He does that nearly every night when he can't sleep. He may have even set off the alarm."

"You know a lot about Engie. Seems a little gay." Scout stated.

Spy looked unamused. "It's my job to know where you all are at every second of the day."

"Ew." Scout whispered behind his hand to Demo who laughed.

"It is getting late, I think it would be best if we handled this situation in the morning. We can always contact Miss Pauling and request directions on how to proceed." Medic interjected before a fight broke out. He already had a headache from the blaring of the alarm.

"Agreed. We shall convene again at six-a.m. sharp." Spy declared. There was another moan of annoyance. Spy rolled his eyes and pulled his cigarette box from the pocket in his suit coat. After retrieving the cigarette, he closed the box with a snap and he exited the room. The rest of the team began to follow his lead and retired to their rooms. Nobody was looking forward to what was to follow should Engineer not turn up.

The orange sun began to rise against the plateaus in the horizon. Brilliant pinks, blues, and purples painted the sky. The morning air was warm, and a gentle wind picked up any loose sand dusting the surface of the ground. The call of a few of Medic's doves rang out through the base, singing their songs to the rising sun.

In the kitchen of the base, Sniper had started the coffee maker. The aroma soon filled the kitchen, and Sniper immediately perked up at the scent. Demo waited patiently next to him, holding a flask in his hand, ready to add some alcohol to his own cup of coffee. Over at the stove, Heavy was frying some eggs in a pan. A kettle sitting on the burner next to the pan began whistling, and Medic grabbed the handle and removed it from the stove. Pyro sat at the table in the dining room with a glass of chocolate milk in front of him. A straw entered the bottom of his mask, so he could drink while maintaining the integrity of his identity. At the other end of the table sat Spy, who held a newspaper in his hands. A delicious looking croissant sat half eaten in front of Spy. Scout walked into the dining room and sat next to Spy, knowing it would irritate the Frenchman. Behind his newspaper, Spy rolled his eyes.

"So, no sign of Engie yet?" Scout inquired.

"No." Spy answered bitterly.

Soldier marched into the dining room. He placed his hands behind his back and stood tall at the head of the table. "Company! Fall in!"

In the kitchen, Medic rolled his eyes and Sniper gave a groan of annoyance. Knowing it was better to just relent to Soldier's call than to argue with him, everyone joined Soldier in the dining room.

"Men, it brings me great shame to admit that we have a traitor among us!" Soldier began. Heavy raised an eyebrow and Scout stopped munching on his spoonful of cereal. "Yes, we have worked our asses off to prove ourselves. We have several medals to prove our victories. I am proud of all of you for giving this team your blood, sweat and tears. But, one of us has deceived this team."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Scout demanded.

"Have you not noticed one of us missing?" Soldier asked matter-of-factly. "A deserter! A traitor! The only punishment for him now, is death!"

"Oh, he's talking about Engie." Scout told Pyro. Pyro nodded.

"He didn't desert us, you imbecile." Spy put down his paper. "All we have to do is call Miss Pauling. I'm sure she will be able to clear this up."

"Oh, right." Soldier then sat down.

"Aye lad, I think ye did a right fine job with yer speech." Demo patted Soldier's shoulder.

"Thanks soldier!" Soldier gave Demo a thumbs-up.

"Well, we should give Miss Pauling a call soon. We're expected to be on the field in an hour." Medic suggested.

"Very well." Spy stood and dismissed himself.

"Wait, who the hell made you the boss? I want to call Miss Pauling." Scout cried.

"Considering you can't even form an intelligent sentence in her presence, I think not." Spy answered flippantly. He made his way to the far wall where the cordless phone was resting on its base. Scout jumped on the table and ran length-wise towards Spy.

"Watch it, you little mongrel!" Sniper yelled, pulling his mug out of the way. Heavy cried out and grabbed his fried eggs from the runner's path, narrowly avoiding Scout's cleat. Scout jumped from the edge of the table and dove towards the phone. With a simple turn, Spy dodged Scout and dialed Miss Pauling's number.

"Spy, you freakin' asshole." Scout muttered angrily from the floor.

"Miss Pauling, yes, it's Spy." Spy tucked the phone between his shoulder and chin, and began to light a cigarette.

"Hey Spy. What's up?" Miss Pauling greeted from the other end of the line.

"Engineer has gone missing. Do you know anything of this?" Spy decided to cut to the chase.

"What? When did he go missing?" Miss Pauling asked in a panic.

"Last night, I believe." Spy puffed on the cigarette.

"Tell Miss Pauling I think she looks lovely today." Scout whispered to Spy. Spy turned to avoid Scout.

"Wonderful. Do you think you guys can fight today without him? I'm going to do some research on my end. It's not like him to up and disappear." Miss Pauling thought.

"We'll certainly be at a disadvantage, but I'm sure we can hold it together." Spy shrugged.

"Awesome. You're the best Spy. I'll get back to you by the end of the day." Miss Pauling promised.

"Very well. Au revoir." Spy dismissed.

"Bye Miss Pauling!" Scout yelled before Spy pushed the 'end' button.

Spy looked down at Scout and told him, "You're pathetic."

"Did she say anything about me?" Scout pressed.

"She never does." Spy confirmed. He then turned towards the rest of the team. "We are to continue with the day as normal."

A series of groans emitted from the men.

"You will stow that attitude! It is an honor to serve this country every day!" Soldier ordered.

"Piss off." Sniper called.

"What are we supposed to do without Engie? Doc never wants to heal me, I rely on the dispensers." Scout pointed out.

"I never heal you because you can never stand still." Medic glowered.

"I will see you all in the armory in thirty minutes." Spy declared and disappeared down the hall.

The men continued with their morning routine. Once the dishes had been abandoned in the sink, one by one they trickled towards the armory. Medic pulled his coat on and buttoned it shut. Sniper calibrated his scope on his rifle. Soldier pumped himself up by performing a series of push-ups. Heavy wrapped his bandolier belts around his shoulders and smiled as he picked up his Sasha. Scout stretched his legs out, preparing to run. Demo tucked his trusty bottle of Scrumpy into his jacket. Spy flipped through his disguises and adjusted his watch. Pyro sat on the bench coloring a picture, his flamethrower propped up beside him. The timer went off, declaring ten seconds until battle. The men lined up at the door, and prepared to run. No one was immune to the rush of adrenaline that fueled their veins during the countdown.

"Begin!"


	3. Chapter 2

**_Chapter 2_**

 _18:02_ _RED Base_ _Teufort, NM_

The doors to the respawn room slammed open with a CRACK. The RED team skulked out into the locker room in silence. Each mercenary approached their locker in disappointment and began to disarm themselves. Scout rolled his head back to crack his neck. He threw his baseball bat and scatter-gun into the locker angrily. Heavy collapsed on the steel bench and retrieved a sandwich from his locker. Pyro sat on the bench beside the larger man in an attempt to be comforting.

"That. Was. Pathetic." Soldier declared. The team had lost miserably to BLU. Scout was constantly in and out of respawn. Medic and Heavy attempted to attack the intelligence room while ubered, but the sentry nest and Soldier waiting for them put up a good defense. As soon as the uber failed, Medic was back-stabbed, and Heavy was rocketed. Sniper even got taken out by the enemy Sniper. No one had a chance at winning that battle, as much as they had tried to regroup.

"Aye, mate. But what did ye expect?" Demo slammed his locker shut upon brandishing a new bottle of Scrumpy. "We don't have an Engie."

"Speaking of which, have any of you blokes heard from Miss P.?" Sniper interjected.

"I'll call her." Spy responded.

"I can call her." Scout offered.

"Stop being annoying. You aren't impressing her by being a clingy little brat." Spy ordered.

"You don't know." Scout countered softly, kicking the tiled floor.

Spy rolled his eyes as he exited the locker room. The men followed suit, preferring to head to their own private quarters to rest and relax. Spy pushed past the door into his smoking room where he could talk to Miss Pauling in peace. He shut the door behind him and brandished a cigarette. Spy approached the cordless phone and pressed the speed-dial button to get Miss Pauling on the phone.

"This is Pauling." Miss Pauling answered.

"Miss Pauling, it's Spy. Have you had any headway on figuring out where Engineer went?" Spy asked.

"No. In fact, things seem out of sorts with the Administrator as well. It's like she's afraid of something. I can't put my finger on it." Miss Pauling explained.

"Interesting." Spy remarked before turning to the TV screen which showed every room in the base. Spy saw something moving in the dark in Medic's lab…and then Medic fell. Several other dark figures began emerging from the shadows of the base. "Miss Pauling, I believe we're being attacked."

"Huh?"

"I'll call you back." Spy promised before ending the call. Spy locked the door to his smoking room and watched as a gas began filling the base. A frantic knock beat against the door.

"Spy, you have to help us!" Scout pleaded. He banged on the door more, but Spy just watched in scrutiny as the men in black began to approach Scout from behind. "Spy! SPY!"

One by one, each man fell as he watched the TV screen. Spy opened the secret hatch hidden under the rug in the center of the room and made his escape. He concealed the hatch before the men in black could kick his door in. Once in the tunnels, Spy moved quickly to get as far away from the base as possible. A wooden door covered by sand in the open desert popped open, and Spy emerged. He watched from afar as the black vans were loaded with his teammates. He felt a sharp pain in his chest as he watched Scout's unconscious body being thrown in the back, but he quickly brushed the feeling away. Spy narrowed his eyes to make out the letters on the side of the van. FBI was printed in large yellow letters. Spy turned his back to the base, pulled his balaclava off, and began walking towards town.

It took him a good half hour to get to Teufort. Once there, he walked down the main street until he reached the door to a bar. Spy pulled the door open angrily and entered. He dusted the dirt and sand off his suit and was greeted with glares from the townspeople. Spy returned the glares before taking a seat at a secluded booth in the back. He retrieved his cell phone from his jacket pocket and called Miss Pauling.

"Pauling." Miss Pauling answered.

"Can you meet me in town?" Spy requested.

"Yeah, sure. What's going on?" Miss Pauling asked hesitantly.

"I'll fill you in soon. Just get here now." Spy pressed.

Miss Pauling was anxiously silent for a minute before answering. "On my way."

In the FBI van, the men began to awaken. Medic was the first to do so. He sat on a bench with his hands handcuffed. His glasses were falling off his nose, and he pushed them up with his shoulder. He immediately began to analyze the scene. Scout was passed out and leaning his head on his left shoulder. Next to Scout was Sniper, whose head was tilted back against the wall of the van. Across from Medic was Heavy, slightly leaning his head forward, his eyes still closed. Pyro sat on the bench to Heavy's right, head resting against Demo's shoulder, who was also still unconscious. On the floor was Soldier, helmet covering his eyes.

"Scout, wake up." Medic whispered to the younger man leaning against his shoulder. Scout was still unresponsive. Medic rolled his eyes and headbutted Scout.

"Ow, what the hell!" Scout cried out in pain. "Damn, doc, what was that for?"

"I need you to get my tools from my pocket. I might be able to get us out of the handcuffs." Medic ordered, turning his back to Scout.

"I'm not touching your butt." Scout protested stubbornly.

"For God's sake, Scout. Now's not the time to be immature." Medic responded in annoyance. "Just get my nerve hook out."

"What the hell's a nerve hook?" Scout asked.

"Take a wild guess Scout." Medic snarked back.

"Ok, I get it. Jeeze." Scout grumbled. He hesitated before reaching into Medic's pocket.

"Now, Scout." Medic growled.

"Fine." Scout whined. He reached his hand into Medic's pocket and grabbed one of the metallic tools. "Got it!"

"Good, now put it in my hand." Medic ordered. Scout maneuvered the tool and as Medic gripped it, the van hit a bump. The tool fell out of his hand and clanged against the floor. "God damn it Scout!"

"It's not my fault that you can't hold onto things!" Scout bit back.

"Whatever, we need to get Soldier awake." Medic ordered.

"How? Dude sleeps through anything." Scout looked down.

"Kick him?" Medic suggested. Scout leaned back and attempted to reach Soldier. Medic leaned back a little, and his longer legs had an easier time hitting Soldier. The van hit another bump and sent Medic flying forward. He fell atop Soldier and rolled off. "Oof!"

"'S goin' on?" Sniper asked, now awake.

"What's going on?" Scout asked incredulously. "We've been kidnapped stupid!"

"Well I figured that, ya bloody git." Sniper cursed.

"What happened?" Heavy demanded.

"Good God!" Demo cried out. "We died!"

"We're not dead, Demo!" Medic yelled. Pyro mumbled, and Medic added, "On the outside."

"How is Solly still asleep?" Sniper asked.

"Man, he could sleep through a nuclear war." Scout remarked.

"Medic, what're you doing on the floor?" Demo asked.

"Trying to get my hands free." Medic answered. He grabbed the tool on the ground and unlocked the handcuffs expertly.

"Wow," Sniper remarked. "Mighty impressive, Doc."

"Yes, well it is a practiced skill." Medic explained.

"How many times have you been arrested?" Sniper asked.

"Who said anything about being arrested?" Medic asked in confusion. Demo laughed and Scout grimaced. Heavy looked to Demo for an explanation. Sniper just shook his head. Medic sat up and rubbed his wrists. "Who's next?"

Back at the bar, Miss Pauling quietly slipped into the booth. She clasped her hands and examined Spy's face. She had only seen him once before without his mask. His hair looked greyer and his face was grim.

"What happened?" Miss Pauling leaned forward.

"Don't talk Emily, just listen." Spy ordered. Miss Pauling swallowed and followed his orders. "After the battle today, we were attacked. It seems as though the US government is involved, specifically the FBI. This goes beyond the Administrator's control."

Miss Pauling wanted to speak but didn't.

"Everyone but Engineer and I, are currently in custody of the FBI. I have a plan, but I need you to work with me. I know you know more than what you let everyone believe. Quite frankly, I'm impressed with how well you've been using naivety. But it ends now." Spy leaned forward, his eyes narrowing dangerously. "What has she done?"

Miss Pauling looked away in guilt. She had promised the Administrator her loyalty. She had killed for, lied for, and protected her. If she told Spy what she knew, she was risking her life. The Administrator would have no choice but to hunt her down. She bit her lip in contemplation before finally relenting. "What I say stays between us."

"I should hope so." Spy remarked.

"Jean," Miss Pauling began, "you're not fighting over gravel."

Spy looked at her in scrutiny. "So we haven't been fighting a useless war after all?"

"Well, originally, yes." Miss Pauling confirmed. "It wasn't until after the Australium incident, that we figured out the truth. Teufort is sitting on a giant tungsten cache."

"Tungsten?" Spy questioned.

"Yes. Where there are large caches of tungsten, there's bound to be almost as much uranium." Miss Pauling explained. "The US government tests nuclear weapons not far from here. However, uranium is a finite and hard to come by resource. The Australium incident gained some attention from unwanted eyes, and so scientists were sent out to Teufort to test the soil. They found tungsten, the scientists disappeared, and you guys have continued fighting ever since. I've been able to keep prying eyes away until now. My guess: the guys have been taken to a military base and are going to be interviewed."

"The government is going to find out just how insane they are." Spy remarked.

"Yes, and that's a problem." Miss Pauling stated.

"How do you mean?" Spy asked.

"To them -- you abandoned them. They have no problem telling the government everything they know about you. And Spy, do you really want the government to know what they know?" Miss Pauling responded.

Spy contemplated his options for a minute. "We're going to need help."

"Do you have anyone in mind?" Miss Pauling asked.

"Yes, but, they're not going to like it."


End file.
